Saturday, January 22, 2011

Talk, Listen and Bond

Spending time with our friends rarely happens these days. Blame it on marriage, kids, work, conflicts in schedules, moods and what-nots. But on those occasions when our friends do take the time out of their busy lives to bond with either me or Peter, we really do appreciate it. After all, the effort and sacrifice go both ways and what can we do is to make the most of the time spent together.

Koryn is one of those people in our lives who really make it a point to bond with us. We've been friends since 2005 but I never really told her about my past, my deep dark thoughts and my secrets. Come to think of it, I don't think many of my friends know a lot about me. Most of the time, I just keep it all inside, write it on my diary or blogs, and whatever personal dilemma I have, I just solve them all in my head. This is why I have tons of self-help books, why I took up Psychology in the first place, and why I have always been mature for my age. As a consequence, I tend to be the go-to person of my friends and rarely do I go to them for advice. Even my guidance counselor before applauded me for being self-sufficient, independent and for basically doing her job coz when it's my time to get counseled, I just sit there, talk to her and give her the solutions to my problems which I've come up with all on my own.

However, on those rare moments that I did try to bring up my issues to my friends, they unknowingly just brushed me aside and made the conversation all about them again. No wonder I like writing about me on my blogs because truth be told, I feel like I never really got the chance to talk about ME. They always do all the talking while I do all the listening and advising. Don't get me wrong though. I love my friends and I always give them what I can. But there are just moments, like lately, when I wish they'd listen to me for a change. Sometimes I think it's already too late. Maybe I've been hurt too much that I've already distanced myself which is why they no longer feel the need to bond with me.

And then there's Koryn... this doe-eyed pretty girl who likes to hang out with us whenever she can. So for the first time, in almost 6 years, I started telling her about me... the other side of me... and I'm glad she listened. Sometimes, that's all a person needs... someone to really talk to without judgment.

So, Koryn, thank you! Despite what you might say, you're a wonderful human being who gave me what I needed and made me feel validated this weekend. Sometimes, that's all I really need... a sounding board and an external positive affirmation about the life choices I have made. See you soon!


Koryn said...

Aww, Jen! This is a sweet post. b Whenever you feel like opening up or showing a different side of you, all you have to do is text me.

And, I know I already told you but I'll say it again--you're one of the most beautiful souls I've met. Not only because of the positive attributes that people know about you but more because of how you face your inner demons and how you choose to deal with them :)

Koryn said...

And just a thought--we never run out of inner demons to battle. I think part of life's journey is all about facing the things and the issues that trouble you. And at the end of the day, how you are and the persons that you've become after you've weathered them is what really matters the most.

Anonymous said...

I wasn't sure what you were talking about in this post, but the dress sure was talking so loudly! Sexy!


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